An open letter by daughter in-law

Sharing a short story from my collection, which is selected as the first story to be published, Book Launch, January 13th 2024 KLC 24 (Kolkata Literary Carnival 2024). 

Marriage or scrutiny under a scanner 24 x 7

An open letter by daughter in-law to her mother in-law

 

Dear mother in-law,

(This is not a grievance letter. It’s my attempt to help you understand our new relation)

Hope this finds you in good health and a happy state of mind. Ever since I have got married to your son, I have noticed a change in your attitude and behavior. Earlier you seemed very welcoming and happy but now I sense a feel of insecurity. Do you see me as a threat? I feel so. You seem to be critical about whatever I do or say especially in relation to your son who is now my husband.

We both have a great thing in common and that is love for the same man. I am not here to break ties of a son from his mother. A son you have given birth to and raised him with your heart and soul. I am here to make my own space as a wife and his life partner. We are not opposite party and it’s not like a war situation where my intention is to over throw you and capture the throne. Where is the throne? Rather who is the throne? Do you consider your son as an object? Please do not burden him like this. I have many aspirations and look forward to a peaceful, harmonious married life. You leave no stone unturned in creating differences. You twist my words and feed negativity about me. A mother has a big heart. All I am requesting is to give me space and time to adjust in your family. I have come from an entirely different background and culture. All this is new and very different. I need time to unlearn and relearn.

Another request is to please stop comparing me with your daughters. They are great as sister in-laws. Let me build up a relation with them on one to one basis. Everything need not be through you. You should be a secure, loving women (with everything in your name.)  Then, why this insecurity? Please do not feed negative stories about me to my husband. Most of the times, I never come to know why he is upset with me? I do have noticed this pattern that after spending time with you and his siblings, he always comes back disempowered with a volatile temperament

Please stop comparing me with other daughter in-laws in your friend’s circle. Each human being is different. This alliance happened because of mutual consent between the girl, the boy and their respective families. Then why I am perceived as a villain on mission to break this home!

Remember how you felt when you got married. The onus is always on elders to make the house environment comfortable for the new bride person. We need to work together to make this work.

I have come as an adult in your life unlike your children whom you have raised up.  I don’t wish to be a daughter to you neither do I want you to be my mother. Let’s respect this beautiful relation of mother in-law and daughter in-law and work towards maintaining its sanctity.

Please communicate if you disapprove of some actions or ways. If you don’t then how will I come to know? We need to keep this communication gates open.

Lets pledge to contribute and please do not compete with me.

Yours,

Daughter in-law

(Dignity & pride of household)