Humour in white coat- Part 1

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Dear Diary,                                               

It,s festival time favourite time of the year when everyone is happy, full of positivity and energy.
So, I thought of sharing few awesome lessons which I have learned from my respected teachers- my patients. I am sure these will bring a slight curve on your face after all smile is the best accessory which many of us forget to wear.

Case study 1- Epidemic encounter

Doctor," Namaste, how are you ? Aapko kya taqleef hai?"
Patient:" You are the doctor, not me, you tell ! If I knew , why would I  come to you ? " ( That makes sense.Doctor silently prays and starts with the examination protocol.

 Case study 2 : Melodramatic encounter.

Doctor : "Namaste , how are you ? What brings you here ?"
Patient ( in tone full of melodrama): " Kya batayein daac....tarrrr sahib, ithhe sassa daa raula hai ! ( problem with mother in law)
Doctor ( taken aback) :"Oh ! that,s fine , parr probelm kya hai ?"
Patient : " This is the problem."

My sympathy for the doctor

Case study 3: Oversmart silent encounter

Doctor :" Namaste!, what are your complaints ?"
Patient keeps quiet. Even after 10-15 minutes doctor fails to get a response.
After sometime, finally the patient speaks up" If I tell you everything, what will you do , paise vasool karne hain. You find out on your own without my help."
Doctor : " Okay there! where are your previous reports ?"
Patient: " Why do you need previous reports  Are you going to copy. You make new report. I have thrown old ones."
OMG! pray for sanity of Doctor.

Case study 4: Docalcholic rural patient, addicted to doctor shopping

Doctor : " Namaste! how are  you ?"
Patient ( in a voice full of remorse and grief ) : " Abb kya batayein, peechle dus saalon se  ilaaj karwa raha/rahi hoon , bimari ka bhed nahin milaa."
( I am visiting doctors since last 10 years, my diagnosis has not yet been made )Aapka naam suna, socha bimari mil jaayegi to paise vasool ho jaayeinge( Heard about you, so have come ).
Poor soul , may God bless with some paise vasool disease. Just joking !

Case study 5 : Innovative patient
a case of delayed periods comes.

Doctor, " when was your last period date ?"
Patient , " constipation hai !"
Doctor '" That,s fine but i want to know your last period date."
Patient ( again replies in same monotonous tone): " constipation hai !"
This goes on for few minutes.
Doctor is about to loose patience so nudges the staff to ask
Staff : " please answer correctly ."
Patient becomes impatient and replies ," Bataye naa ki date ka constipation hai !"

Suddenly, the doctor realises and exclaims, " Youreka ! New term has been coined for  PCOD - polycystic ovarian disease - date ka constipation."

I know many of us will relate with above. Last case is dedicated to all my gynae friends.

God bless our everyday teacher: our patients.

See you soon with some  more humour.

Bye,
Juju













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