Lockdown 2.0#Reel to real life story.

Lockdown 2.0 # Reel to real life story.

With lockdown 2.0 till May 3, once again life has given another chance to indulge in path of self discovery. This write up is dedicated to my dear friend, an Ex army person Major.

Last 100 days or so has brought out innumerable changes in ways of human life with all belief system being shaken, questioned, all worship places being closed, so on . One thing which has time and again established itself is Science and the entire team behind. Hats off, to all my dear fellow front line doctors and para-medics. May God bless them with all the courage, health , adequate PPE,s and peace.

Let me take you on an inner journey of a young girl. She was her papa,s princess and had same rights as her brother in this male dominated society. Her zest for studies, love for exploring life landed her in medical school. A born multi-talented, expressive outspoken personality , army was her foray. Never in her dreams she had wondered that soon her bed of roses would start bearing thorns. A wrong mismatch with subsequent divorce left her bruised and shattered. Could life be so brutal on this little pious young girl ? As time drifted, she gathered herself and lived a fulfilling life , ticking things off her bucket list.

Man is a social animal. You need a companion in this journey of life , more as to witness your moments of joy and share moments of sadness. Her parents were happy with her as she was a so called Yes man to her parents particularly her father. As a parent, her father was in control (Really ! control) of his child ( a lady in her thirties actually).  I always wonder what supreme thrill, parents gets by controlling their children ( emotions too!)

Yearn for life partner led to exploring shaadi.com kinda sites. For each one of us, God has created someone # Jisse tum dhoond rahe ho: who tumhe dhoond raha hai.

Inspite of going in the best amicable way, her father got infuriated at her proposed match. Reason ? out of caste ? out of religion etc , in reality a father,s ego was bruised as to how his child was able to find a suitable match while he had failed 5 years ago which had led to a divorce. A man rather father with wounded ego is much more dangerous than a man eater tiger or a rogue elephant. I will leave the entire home scene to individual reader,s imagination and discretion. After all we have seen enough bollywood movies/ TV soap operas to be a script writer in above scene where a daughter brings home her proposed match to meet with her parents.

To cut the long story short, this young lady fails in convincing her parents, moves into accommodation where she works. With help of some common friends, a court marriage happens and they live happily ever after. 

But……….  Picture abhi baaki hai dost! Jo ending happy nahin , iska matlab who end nahin hai.

Melodrama happens typical like an Ekta Kapoor serial, log kya kaheinge? Apne baap ki izzazat mitti me mila di , kahin ka nahin chhoda, etc…….. Parents stopped talking to her rather cut off the cord and discourage their family members even to interact /congratulate her .

Pause ! breathe ! chill!

This is the point, where I feel the society needs to awaken and shake their conscience, as to where are we heading ? why do we want to control our children,s life- throughout  ? why can,t we treat our children as individuals and respect their decisions ( in this case, I am talking about a woman in her thirties), why don,t we cherish our children and take pride in their actions?

If your child wants to lead his/her own life in their own way , instead of supporting them, why the parent wants to discourage them/ emotionally drain them into thinking that they will regret ( later! So what!).

My favorite quote to my daughter is
“ We ( parents) have given you wings to fly, and not to chop them off or tie them when your time comes to fly !”

Be a support system for your children. Learn to treat them as individuals and empower them.

As Sadhguru says, “ Children come through you, you don’t own them.”

Children are children of future. Let them be free. As a parent, our duty is to nurture them, love them, and see how they will make themselves into human beings with purpose.

Try and understand that the only difference is that we as parents have arrived some 25-30 years earlier than them.

Promise to be back soon with another story.    

Take Care,

Juju.