Karwa Chauth#10 commandments

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 TEN COMMANDMENTS OF MARRIAGE

P.S. This is edited from my last year's blogpost.

"Karwa chauth”, is an auspicious festival in our culture where a married girl prays for long life of her husband.  This is celebrated with immense integrity, love and faith for one,s spouse. This holds a multi dimensional aura with few challenging angles as to why a wife should fast ? Why not her husband ? Infact, there is not a single fast in our culture (as far as my knowledge goes) where a husband fasts for his wife. 
This school of thought even beguiled me for some time in my initial years. However, I followed this ritual as told by my elders. In my sub-conscious mind, a set of dialogues/phrases played (which everyone must have heard) like : “ Marriage is an institution”,“ You should accept your spouse as he is and not make an attempt to change him – unconditional acceptance”
Marriage for a boy means- end (in terms of settlement) whereas for a girl ( > 50%), it is the beginning of a journey (fairy tale ) thanks to Yash Chopra and Karan Johar persons who are epitomes of romance and honeymooning in Swiss Alps. 
Being on this journey for  two decades with few ups and down , I have penned down “ Ten Commandments for a happy marriage”.

First, is “Importance” – make your spouse feel important as much so that your head rises and heart beats proudly for your mate's glory and achievement.
Second, is “Romance” – maintain your sense of humor, make your loved ones smile, let the spark be alive.
Third is “Decisions” – Let the other one choose, make conscious sacrifices, for in their smiles lies your own joy.
Fourth is “ Independence”- Let your mate often be on themselves. A bird knows that it,s heart lies in the nest and it even knows better when flies alone…
Fifth is “ Co-ordination” – plan for working in harmony , plan evening dates with your spouse , plan intimacy.
Sixth is “ Social sphere” – never block the freedom of expression in everybody,s presence. NEVER ! NEVER ! interrupt or try to correct your spouse in front of others.
Seventh is “Communication” – be open, express freely ( more of positive statements ) like you love/ care him/ her every day. Marriage is not a Saving,s Bank A/c. It is a current A/c where one needs daily deposits ( of love, care , compassion etc) and withdrawals (of negativity, remorse, arguments etc..)
Eighth is ” Arguments “- Differences are bound to happen, key is learning to agree to disagree (My FPG,s favourite point), so that arguments metamorphosize into discussions.
Ninth is “Companionship”- Be united ( as one entity) in front of others even if there is disagreement at home (My FPG,s favourite point). Your togetherness is your strength which will keep ill wishers / home breakers at bay.
Last is “Appreciation” – Appreciate your spouse for his/ her unique identity. Don,t try to change. Appreciate for who they are. The world has enough of critics already. 
A wise person once said, "you have accepted a rose and a rose can’t become a jasmine.  However hard you may try. " Appreciate your mate. Marriage is like wine; becomes intense, aromatic and soul soothing with each passing moment.
Celebrate Karwa Chauth with pure love, bliss and dedication, for your husband with no analysis and conditions ! There should be no compulsion. It's a conscious choice. 

May God be with all of you. 
Love, 
Juju


Comments

HS BAKSHI said…
Loved the commandments. Beautiful write up. Once again.
October 22, 2021 at 10:26 PM
Unknown said…
Sometimes situation is known to everybody but analysis is done only after reading or writing..keep writing ...it will help many
October 22, 2021 at 10:42 PM
Unknown said…
Worth reading, valuable thoughts
October 22, 2021 at 11:07 PM
Daisy said…
Loved reading the commandments. Though, I would love to agree to disagree here & there. On the whole, a nice sum up. Keep writing.
October 22, 2021 at 11:51 PM
Amrita Rana said…
A good write up though situations and environment will differ from person to person. Usually our beliefs and ways become more rigid with passing years. One may accept each other's limitations but dislikes can't become likes. The 10 commandments are very nicely expressed. Keep it up..
October 23, 2021 at 8:02 AM
anjali said…
Beautiful write up . Very nicely put. An open secret formula of happy married life
October 23, 2021 at 6:18 PM
Anupriya Sharma said…
Beautifully writtenđź“ť... Lines which everyone want to write but can't pen like u... Excellent
October 23, 2021 at 8:36 PM
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